Funniest India I’ve ever read

India has a rich cultural heritage, but it doesn’t really matter because it is quickly being displaced by the more evolutionarily fit “American Culture”©. The Taj Mahal, a burial plot for some woman who died a long time ago in a car crash, is important because it is featured in many American Saturday morning cartoons.

The people of India used to be very civilized until they got bored of it. Then, some Europeans saw India and decided they wanted it. When the Queen heard them whine for it, she decided it was ok for them to have it if they would fight the French. Then, one very old bald man said that we must not fight for independence. That will confuse the British. This Reverse Psychology worked as the British got confused and left.

Until the population of India exploded, India was a country where each person was allotted 5 square feet of space for living. Even as the government was waiting for the population to stop growing, it kept growing and exploded which led to lot of loans to develop infrastructure. As of January 1, 2001, the number of people in India exceeded the number of gods they prayed to. This led to a request for creation of more Gods, whose temples were constructed with the help of a loan of $20 million from the World Bank.

The population explosion is the most lethal of a notorious pair of Indian weapons of mass destruction, the other being the “peaceful nuclear explosions” which replaced the bow-and-arrow with many tests being conducted from 1974 onward. The original Canadian-language documents which served as the basis for the first Indian atomic bombs may be viewed during tourist season at the Mahatma Gandhi memorial World Peace and Nuclear Explosions theme park in downtown New Cleveland.

All of this taken from the funny Uncyclopedia!

# Traffic moves on neither side of the road. (Cows and horses in India have right hand drive).

# Kashmir is neither part of India nor Pakistan, but actually a stealth province of Yugoslavia, which was traded for Chechnya in a secret deal with Afghanistan and Israel in 1948.